Sunday, June 10, 2007

I saw my neighbor putting out his garbage tonight. So I got reminded and put mine out (Except it isn't garbage night.).

I'm hyper-vigilant about putting out the trash cans. Because my husband's dad use to do it. Before he got too sick. Now he isn't here to do it or to remember to do it or to remind one of us (my husband) to do it --because he died a few months ago. He and I had a strange relationship that felt complicated. We got in each other's way mostly, I think. The trash was his thing. I still park on the street instead of the driveway out of habit after he scratched my car once rolling the cans out to the curb. Now sometimes we forget to bring them back in --and the neighbors will do it.

I cried three times tonight thinking about all of this.

If you look to the left on the street there is a bagged ad for a local landscaping company with some little rocks in it. We get one every few weeks. I always take the rocks out (I can't throw away rocks for some reason) and I toss them into our front yard (um. ruh roh.). . .